Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Gawne baby, gawne!

So I overdid it over the weekend. Rather than having a nice relaxing weekend in Florida, we met up with A From LA at the Hard Rock hotel and I proceeded to get very schnockered on Guinnii Sunday night. Olympic sprints in the casino optional because I'm such a klassy gal.
So I wasn't looking forward to coming home on Monday night, given my thentitive condition and having to return to work on Tuesday. Add to that a barfy, poopy puppy waking you up at 5 in the morning and it can only go downhill from there. However, while I'm wheezy with a cold due to all the fun and games, there is actually a light at the end of this tunnel.

But while we're on the subject, it's no fun being Wheezy

Let me start by telling you that hell indeed has frozen over! That pigs are flying out there doing loop-de-loops over the Empire State Building. And yes, we have discovered that the pope is in fact Jewish!

"Shalom, my peoples!"

Why? Because they fired Mr. Incredible. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, Goldenballs Has Left The Building! We now have a kinder, gentler environment in which to work in! You know the lil' song and dance the Munchkins do when the house falls on the Wicked Witch of the East?

Ding dong, the ding dong is dead!

They describe rapture as a mixture of "all your birthdays and Christmases rolled into one". (In my case, that would be a whole lotta Hanukahs!) Well, this occurrence is those two things aaaa-haannd...

The day I met C

The day I got married

Getting my driver's license

Some other days that shall remain nameless in this family-friendly blog

And the birth of my future child. (No, I'm not pregnant, but my guess is motherhood ranks pretty high up there.)

It's aaaaalllllll that and more! Although I was not in the office at the time it happened, I can live with the fact that I never got to say goodbye. Yeah, sure. That and the idea that I will never have to look at his smug, bad-writin', Verdana-lovin’ mug again.

What am I saying...I don't wish unemployment on anyone. And I really should not gloat at someone else's misfortune.

Oh, who am I kidding? Payback's a bitch, sucka! Yeah, I suppose that means my soul needs some saving, but I'll worry about that later. Right now, all I want to do is gloriously roll around in this feeling like Zoe Dawg does in other dogs' scat when we go to the park.

C'mon Wheezy, let's dance!


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