Doggie dentist or Dr. Feelgood?

At this very moment, my parents’ dog is high as a kite.

He’s getting his teeth cleaned and since my dad was opposed to him going under general anesthesia, Jaxon The Dog has been given a plethora of sedatives and gas to boot. If this is anything like when I had all four of my wisdom teeth pulled at the same time, then this dog is flying. He’s probably so far gone, he’ll be meowing.

This is your dog's brain on drugs

There goes Jaxon running in the meadow of his dreams, chasing purple polka-dotted pussycats with gimpy legs. Nice big bags of dirty laundry are all around so he can sniff to his heart’s delight and T-bone steaks are just pouring from the skies. And they talk! Those nice big, juicy steaks are falling all around him saying, "Jaxon, eat me!" "No, eat me first!"

What's a dog to do?

And when he gets tired, he can just roll over onto his back because people are lining up just so they can rub his belly for hours and hours and hours on end. I almost feel sorry for the dog when he wakes up. He has it pretty good, but nothing can compete with this vision of doggie Utopia.