Houston, we have a problem on the landing strip

So, I'm leaving for Florida tomorrow on a well-deserved break. This calls for pre-beach grooming. I'm talking about getting the nails did and a visit to the waxing lady.

Because right around this time, people tend to mistake me for a certain pre-historic creature

It was time to get everything looking pretty and nice for my week on the beach.

Well!

Since I had no time except on Monday to go to this appointment - the day my usual waxing lady is off - I opted for one of her co-workers. Bad idea. Bad, bad, BAD idea!

I go in, I go out. I'm happy. My legs and bikini area are smooth and hair-free. I go get my nails done and then head home. Florida, here I come!

Then, I'm packing and doing that thing girls tend to do when they pack, which is basically try on every outfit to see if that's even what we want to take. And since I have a full length mirror...well, while I was in the midst of changing vacation outfits, I noticed something was not right.

"Heh?" I waddle up to the mirror, with my beach pants still around my ankles and get a closer look. "HEH?!?"

"Someone call air traffic control - this runway's no good"

I run into the bathroom and get the portable mirror we have in there, check things out, and proceed to scream for my husband. "Ceeeeeeeee!"

C comes running in. "What?!? What's the matter?"

I point down. "The waxing lady made my vaja look all lopsided!"

He looks down and sees what I see - a nearly perfect bikini line with the exception of one big deviation from what should be a straight bikini line. A half-arc of well, okay I'll say it - hair, looking like it's trying to make a break for freedom. How I missed this, I don't know - but now it's like I paid a visit to Mrs. Magoo the waxing lady. C starts laughing. Not just a little, a lot.

"Don't laugh! This isn't funny!" I huff. As I stomp off, I hear him start laughing even harder.

Yeah, you laugh, buddy - my wonky vaja and I aren't speaking to you until you apologize!