I'm not your Plan B

With the advent of a bright new year, and a clean slate of sparkling possibilities, is the return of the same old shit.

Our NYE dinner reservations with the A's didn't happen, because male A had to work that day and we couldn't guarantee we'd make our reservation. Still, we all still wanted to spend New Year's together, so C and I went to where they were staying at, while in the city. As a result, several of their family members and a couple of friends also joined us, as female A said it was cool.

Now - the fallout. Certain people have decided to give me the cold shoulder because they weren't invited. What is this - the Romper Room? Get over it. Yes, get over it. So, it was New Year’s. The invitations didn’t go out weeks in advance, because there were no invites. There was no “Save the Dates!” It was not my home to begin with. That simple – so don’t try to make it all complicated.

I’m don’t go pouting every time I’m not included in other people’s plans, even as events are rehashed in front of me at a later time. I don’t expect to be included in everything. I don’t dish out comments like “I was so hurt when I wasn’t invited” or “Why didn’t you invite me?” although I’ve gotten them – several times. Invitation Guilt over something so small is unfair and selfish, and I'm not alone in thinking that. As someone else so eloquently put it: Boo-fucking-hoo.

Which is funny in a way, because the same people who are annoyed with me, are the same people I haven't spent time with on a one-to-one basis in a long time. Should I assume that they're only interested in spending time with me, as long as it's a group situation? Maybe I smell bad? Maybe I'm boring. But I'm will not stomp my foot over it and go around feeling sorry for myself.

So I reserve the right to spend more time with certain people exclusively, and not make a big production of planning and inviting everyone. Just as some of you should and will reserve the right to do the same.